Archives - Hot Fleshlight Girls Are In Town

What can you do when out with a boy?
What do you say, when he feels you’re his toy?
What do you wear, when a boy comes to call?
I mean, he is normal height and I am just so tall,
Does he stand on his toes to kiss me, or do I bend for him?
What do I say when he offers me love, not sex, but love?
Do I coo and coo, like does the dove?
How do I act, when he holds my hand?
Do I scream, or be happy he is my man?
What do I do, when he wants to come in for a nightcap?
Do I invite him in, or do I his face slap?
What do I do when he pulls me close for that last goodnight kiss?
Do I resist his efforts, and tell him he missed?
Or do I snuggle up to him and return his passionate bliss?
What do I do, when he is driving away?
Do I just go inside or on the porch do I stay?
Do I blow him a kiss as he drives into the night?
Or do I watch as he drives outta sight,
Wishing he would still be, on this front porch with me?

Barbara Lynn Terry

A look at potential contenders for the box office crown in 2010. Featuring trailers of Alice In Wonderland, Iron Man 2, Robin Hood, Shrek 4, Prince Of Persia: The Sands Of Time, Sex and City 2, Toy Story 3, Inception, Clash Of The Titans and others.

Videos of people taking toy bratz and making them have sex with each other..
And it’s entirely possible it didn’t. There’s certainly not enough proof to say that life can ONLY happen when there’s lots of sunlight, which therefore makes investigation of the rest of the Solar System worthwhile. Whether we find life there or not, we learn a lot either way.
Minnesota-nice: totally passive aggressive
Nobody can hear you.
They taste fake because they’re based off an extinct breed of bananas that used to be popular but got wiped out through some virus iirc.
And This is England…
Well that hand/eye dude is pretty fucked up.

Also the scene where a guy casually kills that guys kid by bludgeoning his face in with a bottle.

Its probably one of those “best movies I’ll never watch again”. Right up there with things like Schindlers List. Everyone needs to watch it once.
Check again, OP had the wrong username.
They can come off as affected, but the genuine ones are cute.
Seems that girls in the US learn very early on that being pretty is a license to be a cunt without repercussion. I, on the other hand, am educating my son otherwise.
Phrenology was used in running schools (mostly for troubled children). They would look at the shape of your head and try to figure out where you were deficient.

D.A.R.E. was spreading misinformation about marijuana.
Condemned: Criminal Origins – Launch Title for the 360 and one of the scariest games ever.

The storytelling element it relied on the most was this idea that you dont know if the people who are attacking you are just drugged out homeless, or sick from a bird-flu that infected the city, or even the result of some scientific experiment.

It kept things very vague, for good reason, and the constant twists in the story just led you farther down the rabbits hole.

O and all the while your chasing a Serial Killer who kills Serial Killers – yeah it was damn amazing and got an unfortunately underwhelming sequel that dropped the mystery and intrigue for a more straight up monster vs man story.

And it wouldn’t make sense to arrive at a work place all sweaty.

Yes, it would. You would be at a place where you are making money. You are 18, unless you are lucky enough to get an office job, you’re going to be sweating while you work.
ER doctor here! I don’t do general anesthesia (like for surgery) but I do sedations for painful procedures (as in asleep, but breathing on their own). I frequently use ketamine for this, which can provoke some wonderful reactions upon awakening. A few that I’ve seen:

Patient sang me an opera using only the words “sixty four”
Scrawny little kid: “WOOOO LAST CALL FOR SHOTS!!!”
Patient recognized the orthopedist who had reduced their fracture and insisted on calling him Dr. Huggie-bear

No astronaut would risk their reputation to say the shit he just said. If he’s an astronaut, it’s because is daddy bought him a buzz light year for xmas.
I always say “Cell-pho-walla-key” before I leave anywhere.
Extend godly powers?
wtf? why change the keys every game? am i missing something?
LPT if you want to count something use numbers in sequential order

LPT if you are thirsty, get a drink

LPT if you want easy karma post obvious shit to /r/lifeprotips and pretend it’s inspired
Fallout, bringing back the classics.
They were trying WAYYY too hard to be another ‘The Office’ with a female lead in the first season. They really find themselves, in seasons 2 and 3.
Shit, we need to get this patient in quickly. … Take a photo and let’s land.
RCIA my friend.

Hans, he voss a hansum man
And far from destitute
Mit plenty money in der can
To pay for weekly prostitute

And zo, he vent to Helga’s den
Down off ze Reeperbahn.
He had a hump der, now an zen
Undt just becoz he can!

“I vant to have der Kinky sex
And thrill you wit mein power”
She slowly opened wide her leks
“Ok but it’s 300 Euros per hour! ”

She led him to ze darkened room
Ver she had taken many boys
Her eyes bulged with a sonic boom
As from his sack, he pulled his toys.

Four big springs with ties to lash
And a plastic duck call thing
He asked if she would have a bash
And he would make her scream and sing

The springs vent on her arms and legs
The duck call in her mouth,
He bounced and banged her, such great sex
1 hour before his old man went south!

“Mein Gott”, she cried. “You shall not pay!
The thrill had made her filled but weak.
“What was that called? ” He heard her say.
He told her, “Four Sprung Duck Technique! ”

(Rhymed version of a classic joke.)

Reece Kaye

Ex NYC Governor Eliot Spitzer likes it dirty! As has learned, a hooker just outed the former politician, claiming he likes to be walked on a leash and play kinky sex games.

Former escort Svetlana Travis Zakharova struck a misdemeanor plea bargain after being charged with extorting $400,000 from Spitzer. In the explosive legal papers from Manhattan Supreme Court, the Russian native promised to “discuss any and all actions or events that she participated in with Spitzer.”

In an attempt to lift a gag order imposed as part of her prosecution, Zakharova gave sick details into her alleged sexual relationship with Spitzer, 58, explaining his dark fetishes and twisted fantasies. She even provided a series of shocking photos from her supposed encounters with the ex-governor, which show a variety of sex toys including a leather leash and condoms.

“Moreover, the fact that Spitzer was paying young girls to insert sex toys into his anal cavity and walk him around the floor on all fours with a leash is conduct that he made a conscious choice to engage in,” wrote the ex-hooker’s lawyer, Joseph Murray.

According to the papers, Spitzer used the pseudonym “George Fox” — the name of a longtime pal — to book a room at the Mayflower Hotel in Washington, DC, for a night with the escort.

As part of her legal battle, Zakharova also accused Bronx District Attorney Darcel Clark (who served as a prosecutor in her case) of protecting Spitzer simply because he is a “rich, powerful man.” According to her lawyer, she now wishes to disqualify Clark, as “there is evidence of corruption we want to make public.”

“If these facts are embarrassing to Spitzer and his family then shame on Spitzer for engaging in the conduct in the first place and shame on the Bronx DA for catering to Spitzer by trying to suppress [Zakharova’s] right to free speech,” state the court papers.

The former escort told officials that her sexual relationship with Spitzer turned violent when he called her a “Russian whore” and strangled her after she refused to have relations with him during a specific encounter. He allegedly yelled at her saying “What am I paying you for?”

Zakharova said she called 911 when the vile attack occurred, and when police arrived, Spitzer tried to defend himself by name-dropping and threatening officials, even saying: “Do you know who I am? Should I call Bill [Bratton]?,”

Zakharova concluded her case claiming police never arrested Eliot Spitzer due to his political power, even though it was clearly the law.

Stay with Radar for updates.

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The post Kinky Ex-Governor Eliot Spitzer Likes To Be Leashed, Walked Like A Dog, Hooker Claims appeared first on Radar Online.

He deals with his cancer just like he dealt
with that stupid war back in the Nam; he curses himself
for all those unfiltered cigarettes he smoked in between
lighting up the jungle with tracers so he could see to shoot
another pair of black pajamas in the rice paddy below
who was still aiming a loaded weapon at him and his buddy’s head…
Read my lips Charlie…you’re dead.
He deals with his cancer just like he dealt
with that cheating dumb bitch of a first wife; he knew
how she had mourned deeply over the death of Elvis and not
for the death of his love or his active sex drive after he’d
caught her in bed with that eight inch chocolate vibrator
which had come complete with another man’s body attached.
He deals with his cancer just like he dealt
with his kids; promising not to nurture growing young sociopaths
with new toys and fancy cars but rather to deny them like he had been
by a father who made him work for every dime he ever had.
Tough love from a tough man….
He deals with his cancer just like he dealt with everything in life;
knowing that God loves him and he had brought him down
to a level, where even he could be broken…and then reborn…
Crying salted tears, he leaves a note…telling Cancer to kiss his ass…

2008 ©

Ted Sheridan

A British banker has been accused of murdering two women. 29-year-old Rurik Jutting was arrested on Saturday at his home in Wan Chai, Hong Kong.

A British banker has been accused of murdering two women. 29-year-old Rurik Jutting was arrested on Saturday at his home in Wan Chai, Hong Kong.

Law enforcement officials had discovered the bodies of two naked female victims inside his luxury apartment. One of the women had been found inside a suitcase that was placed on the balcony while the other was located lying inside the residence with suspected knife wounds to her buttocks and neck.

Reportedly, the living room was covered in blood. Jutting was standing over one of the women when police arrived on scene.

The second victim found inside the suitcase, had begun to decompose, indicating that she had been deceased for days.

A smartphone, cocaine and sex toys were found in the apartment. Jutting is the one who contacted police. A number of media outlets have referred to both victims as prostitutes.

According to court paperwork, Jutting was a trader at Bank of America Merrill Lynch. He resigned from his duties last week.

An automatic reply on his work email account generated a response that read “I am out of the office. Indefinitely. For urgent enquiries, or indeed any enquiries, please contact someone who is not an insane psychopath.”

Jutting has been charged with two counts of murder. Police are currently investigating if there are more victims. A former girlfriend of Jutting has since spoken out in light of the allegations and said she knew of the accused as a nice man.

My darling missus
Loves her chocolate kisses.
Watching, she provocatively
Undresses the foil,
Artfully revealing the dark creamy skin
Like a casino dealer toying with a deck of Holye’s
For that brief moment it seems
Like hours,
As she savors this flavor.
The taste so simple, yet so complex,
Even Comparing it to the likes of everyday sex!
The sweetness so fluffy light.
She flicks her tongue in delight.
I’m so jealous,
Yet at the same time overzealous.
I’m a man of means,
And by no means.
Can I be replaced by a substance
Made of cacao beans.
Her eyes are filled with bliss
As she devours this kiss.
She gently smiles and softly winks at me,
Numbing so, as if stung
by an African honey bee.
The happiness it brings her,
Makes me smile.
And the love that comes from this foiled piece,
makes it all…worthwhile.

Jay Aguiniga

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